Marriage Tips ...

So, we all know that marriage is not easy! It takes about 10 minutes for the euphoria to wear off, and after that it is hard work. So what can you and I do to help us strengthen our marriages before there is a major conflict, rather than waiting for World War 3 to start fixing things in the most important relationship you have with another human being?

These 10 things come from a great resource called All Pro Dad, and guys if you are not signed up to get their daily emails to help you be a better husband and father ... do it now! (your wife and kids will thank you for it :-)

#1 Always put your spouse first: This is a HUGE principle and key to reducing relationship stress. Ideally, husband and wife both put the other first. But the only aspect you can control is you.

#2 Have fun together: Movies, walks, picnics, games, trips etc. Not just fun but hilarity. Laughing together is great relationship medicine.

#3 Build “together time” into your schedule: Stop awarding “Time with your spouse” the status of leftovers! Your relationship is more important than any other priority on any kind of schedule. If that means scrawling “Relax together” on the calendar in indelible marker, then so be it!

#4 Don’t sweat the small stuff: When you feel stress coming on, ask this question, “Is this a moral issue?” If not – and nine times out of ten the issue in question is not, then let it go. Talk together about your priorities, constantly. Remind yourselves what really counts. Simplify your lifestyle. Celebrate what you have.

#5 Give back, and do it together: Work at the soup kitchen; volunteer with a faith-based community; hook up with a group that helps the less fortunate or restores the environment. Throw yourselves into charitable causes, together, and watch things fall into perspective.

#6 Communicate clearly and respectfully: Misunderstandings are responsible for a lot of tension. Always keep your spouse in the loop and always communicate with love and good manners.

#7 Tell the truth: The aphorism goes like this – when you tell the truth you don’t have to remember what you said the last time. People who don’t keep secrets experience less stress in relationships.

#8 Hold hands; hug; make out! Physical contact is a proven stress reliever. Squeeze onto the same chair to watch TV – just hang all over one-another. Reach out and take your spouse’s hand while walking, driving, or at an event. Be deliberate about demonstrating affection via physical contact.

#9 Play to your strengths – and hers: Effective teachers use students’ strengths to overcome weakness – it simply works better than focusing on the negative. Pay attention to your spouse’s strengths - build up, affirm, encourage. Criticism always leads to more stress.

#10 Live within your means: Money problems are the leading cause of stress in American marriages. Work this one out. Take preventative measures. Remember (#4-Don’t sweat the small stuff)? It turns out most of the stuff we get into debt over is not worth the stress.